Marcus Aurelius Meditations
Marcus Aurelius: Do, soul, do; abuse and contemn…
Do, soul, do; abuse and contemn thyself; yet a while and the time for thee to respect thyself, will be at an end. Every man's happiness depends from himself, but behold thy life is almost at an end, whiles affording thyself no respect, thou dost make thy happiness to consist in the souls, and conceits of other men.
The passage follows a public-domain translation of Meditations. The reading beside it is ours.
When you make your worth depend on other people's opinions, you hand them the keys to your happiness. Marcus is scolding himself for neglecting his own judgment while chasing approval from other minds. The problem is familiar: refreshing for likes, replaying a manager's comment, choosing a career path mainly to impress people, or staying silent because someone might disapprove. External feedback can be useful, but it cannot become your inner court of appeal. People are busy, inconsistent, and often projecting their own concerns. You need a standard that travels with you: did you act honestly, courageously, and fairly? If so, praise is pleasant but not necessary; if not, praise cannot repair the problem. Today, notice one decision you are making mainly for appearances. Ask what you would choose if no one could see it. Then take one small action that earns your own respect.
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