Seneca: It is, I repeat, the setting a great value on…

Anger grows when we assign enormous value to things that cannot carry that weight. An inheritance, a reputation, someone else's attention, a coveted relationship—these can all matter, yet none are worth turning your mind into a prison. The more you tell yourself, “I must have this or I have been ruined,” the easier it becomes for anyone to provoke you. That is why envy, rivalry, and possessiveness so often lead to madness. They turn external goods into tests of our worth. Be honest about what you want, but hold it with an open hand. If someone disappoints you, competes with you, or takes something you hoped for, you still retain the essential things: your choices, your conduct, and your ability to begin again. Do not give a temporary possession the authority to command a permanent fury.