Epictetus Enchiridion
Epictetus: When you eat with another, then, remember not…
When you eat with another, then, remember not only the value of those things which are set before you to the body, but the value of that behavior which ought to be observed towards the person who gives the entertainment.
The passage follows a public-domain translation of the Enchiridion. The reading beside it is ours.
A meal is never only about the food. It is also about attention, gratitude, and the person sharing the table with you. Epictetus asks us to remember the human relationship surrounding the pleasure in front of us. That applies far beyond dinner. When someone hosts, helps, recommends you, or makes time for you, do not consume the benefit while ignoring the giver. Put away the phone at a meal. Notice the effort behind the invitation. Be considerate of the pace, needs, and comfort of others. This does not require elaborate gratitude speeches; often it is as simple as arriving on time, helping clean up, or listening well. The Stoic point is that appetite is not our only guide. Good manners are a form of justice. Today, treat one ordinary exchange as more than a transaction. Remember that a person, not just a service, is on the other side of it.
Related passages
- Marcus Aurelius Let this be thy only joy, and thy only comfort, from one sociable kind action without intermission to pass unto…
- Marcus Aurelius What Socrates answered unto Perdiccas, why he did not come unto him, Lest of all deaths I should die the worst kind of…
- Marcus Aurelius And lastly, which beareth me that tread upon it, and beareth with me that so many ways do abuse it, or so freely make…